A Child's Chronic Illness

I was referred by Johnny’s endocrinologist, right after she’d shared the diagnosis with Johnny’s parents: “Type I Diabetes, Juvenile Onset.” Johnny was eight. Parents Frank and Mary were clearly capable of meeting the demands of their son’s new condition. And the medical professionals they had assembled – endocrinologist plus primary care physician – were top notch. Frank and Mary had turned to me, it became clear, to help them get through the emotional hurdles of first accepting for themselves the reality of a chronic illness, and then sharing that truth with Johnny and his two younger sisters for it.

Working with them, I wrote a storybook that told Johnny’s story, in eight-year-old language, explaining to him what “chronic” would mean for him, and emphasizing that his illness was “no one’s fault.” The key conversation would be Frank and Mary telling their children that Johnny would have this condition “for the rest of his life.”  That truth was key to defusing stress and strengthening the relationships of everyone in the family. Acceptance that Johnny’s condition was permanent and not temporary–first from the parents, then Johnny and his sisters–would be the foundation for proper diabetes management.

During several sessions, I worked with Johnny and his parents so everyone really understood both the meaning of “chronic” and what daily tasks would need to happen. Most importantly, we worked to reassure Johnny that Mommy and Daddy would always love him and take care of him and his sisters. Throughout our sessions, his play centered around bravery. Ten years later, Johnny is a healthy, well adjusted 18-year-old, with his diabetes in good management. He has stayed in touch with me, and in fact, told me he’d written a college-application essay about our experiences together. He still has the stuffed lion we played with that says, "It's a brave lion, but full of love. Because you helped me take control of my fears."